Some indescribably moronic individual was keeping a pet king snake on the floor above me. She’d kept the thing under wraps for weeks, but then, in the the time-honored tradition of illicit dorm-bound reptiles everywhere, it escaped. Now the creature is roaming the halls (and possibly the ventilation shafts), searching…searching… endlessly searching for human flesh.
(The fact that [...]
Posts Tagged ‘college’
Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, dorm complaints, jesus h christ! on October 20, 2008 | 1 Comment »
College Fail.
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, epic fail, I hate people on September 24, 2008 | 2 Comments »
To the man who’s been preaching outside the Union for the past 2 days:
You’re doing it wrong, moron.
Honestly, I’ve never been so embarrassed to be called a Christian. Except, oh yeah, I’m not anymore. This dude revoked my Christian card. You read that right. I had the audacity to suggest that once a person was saved, they [...]
Seriously?
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, dorm complaints on September 8, 2008 | 1 Comment »
Dorm Complaint #34
Whoever you are, stop putting entire rolls of toilet paper in the toilets. Honestly, what kind of idiocy is that? I’m gonna get cabin fever from living with this many people eventually, and when I do, the Toilet Paper Bandit will be first on my shit list. (Unintentional puns FTW!)
Also, my roommate is watching the [...]
Will The Real Vice President Please Stand Up?
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, fail, starbucks childrens crucade on August 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
There’s a brand-new Starbucks in the Union: big fireplaces, clean upholstery, thick white mugs…Lovely.
And depressing.
The baristas are kids, barely older than me. The cold bar is about the size of a shoebox; bad news, considering that despite our newfound worldliness (which entails, of course, sucking down straight espresso shots a la Baudelaire in a Parisian [...]
Why So…Popular?
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, epic win on August 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Just a brief note. Seeing the phrase: “Why so serious?” on 23 whiteboards on my dorm floor alone makes me very happy.
This Is Where I Take A Bow.
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, farewells, mushiness on August 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Adieu, my dear friends (or whoever the heck else reads my blog). This is my last day in Mesa. Tomorrow it’s off to Hemptown, USA. I’ll miss you all, but check back here for regular updates and hopefully links to some serious writing.
May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at [...]
“I’m Happy, Feeling Glad, I Got Sunshine In A Bag…”
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged college, sophie's got nothing on this on August 19, 2008 | 1 Comment »
Finished packing my books and movies last night. I had no idea it was gonna be this difficult. In fact, I taped both boxes shut so I couldn’t change my mind and start adding more. I probably won’t need all these, let alone have time to read/watch them, but I can’t bear to leave them [...]
